12 MAJOR RULES TO AVOID FIGHTS IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP

 

“You can’t have a relationship without any fights , but you can have a relationship WORTH a fight !”

Fights are inevitable in a relationship where you feel care , jealousy and insecurity for the person you love , hence you can’t avoid a fight but at-least you can overcome it , by following these simple , under-rated but really important points that help in overcoming the worst times in your relationships :-

  • COMMUNICATION:-

Communication becomes one of the most important aspects that’s help in curbing out the misunderstandings that form a major reason for fights in a relationship , especially in a long distance relationship it plays a major role. So the more clarity is there between you and your partner the more happy you are , so the first and the most important rule is to, TALK.

  • TRUST :-

Trust should always be mutual in a relationship. It’s very important to trust your partner and to be trusted in return. In fact, trust is what keeps a relationship away from complications. In spite of differences and arguments, trust assures you that your partner loves you. This feeling of trust that you share mutually is what makes the relationship last for long.

Love makes you feel special, but it’s trust that keeps you strong. Trust keeps insecurities at bay. When you trust each other, you know that you can fight all problems. You feel safe and invincible being with your partner.

 

  • RESPECT :-

Without respecting an individual we cant expect the relationship to stand firm for a long time.. After the early days of commitment, when the charm or curiously begin to fade, its trust and respect which keep the things working. And moreover we would not want to live with a person who don’t gives respect to us.

  • LOVE:-

If you value someone you need to do everything possible to show them that and to make them happy.

Some people simply don’t know how to show love; even though they feel affection and love, they are incapable of showing love. Or even worse still, they show it wrongly.

Feeling like your feelings are not reciprocated in everyday life, even though the feelings are there, creates a deep sense of emptiness and discomfort.

And whether you believe it or not, there are a lot of couples that end up distancing themselves not because of a lack of love, but because one’s patience ran out.

 

 

  • UNDERSTANDING:-

The reason partners complain to each other is because they are not getting their needs met. What are these needs? They vary with each person. One partner may feel disconnected from her mate and may want to feel like she matters to him. If her partner knew this he would probably be willing to say something to help her feel better. It might sound something like, “Honey I am happy to be with you.” It doesn’t take much to fill what’s needed as long as you know what’s needed. That is understanding. Unfortunately, when people are unhappy it usually comes out sounding like, “Hey, you didn’t pick up the dinner plates. Why don’t you ever take out the trash?” These criticisms may give us a clue about the feelings underneath. She may feel ignored and become sad and then angry, and all those feelings come out in complaints about the dinner plates or the garbage

  • TAKING CARE OF EXPECTATIONS:-

What about expectations in a relationship? In a sense, expectations are the flipside of obligations; if someone has an obligation towards you, you usually have an expectation that that obligation will be fulfilled. Again, this is similar to rights language in moral or legal philosophy; if Bob has a firm duty towards Barbara, then Barbara has a right (or claim) to have that duty fulfilled. For example, if Bob has a duty not to steal from Barbar, then Barbara has a right not to be stolen from by Bob; if Barbara has a duty to help Bob (perhaps based on a promise or other commitment), Bob has a claim on Barbara’s assistance.So taking care of your partner’s expectation is really important because your partner is making efforts for you.

  • DON’T JUDGE WITHOUT A FACT:-

When you judge someone, you are looking down at what they do in their life as not acceptable or not good enough for you. Judging is when you can’t accept the behavior of another person so you impose your standards upon them.Judgment can be one of the most damaging weapons in a relationship, as it tells your partner that it’s not okay to be themselves. This builds resentment in them and will eventually crumble even the most intimate relationships.If it doesn’t crumble then it suffers.

 

  • ABILITY TO ACCEPT:-

One of the things I have learned from couples who have healthy relationships, is to accept your partner, as they are, not as you wish them to be. This sounds rather obvious. And it is, in the beginning of the relationship, when we are tanked with hormones and on our best behavior. But over time, we get to see our partner in all their glory and it may not have been what we were expecting.

This is when being able to fully accept your lover is essential. It doesn’t mean you have to agree with everything they say, do, or believe. But you have to know that this is who they are. They are not you and for some people this can be upsetting. I know, hard to believe, but it is amazing how many people come into my office wanting me to change their partner — make them understand how incorrect they are in their beliefs and actions. This is non-acceptance at its highest form

 

  • ABILITY TO FORGIVE:-

Forgiving your partner if they’ve done something to upset you can be one of the hardest things to do in a relationship.When you’re feeling disappointed, angry or betrayed, the idea of forgiving someone can feel a little bit like giving in – as if, by letting go of your resentment, you’re allowing them to ‘get away with it’.

It can be more tempting to hang onto negative emotions – acting distant and frosty as a way of punishing the person who has upset you. It’s not unusual to feel this way. Working through these kinds of difficult feelings can take some time. But forgiveness is a bold step in the right direction. It involves you being able to make a deliberate decision to put your partner’s transgressions – or perceived transgressions – behind you, so you can both move forward together

 

  • DON’T ALLOW YOUR EGO TO RUIN THE GAME:-

Ego has a role in spoiling many relationships, and it’s not just a problem with people who are dating. Ego can ruin friendships and put a wedge between family members, too. If you have had a string of unsuccessful relationships, you need to let go of your ego and take a step forward toward true happiness. For the egotist, being right all the time is closely associated with feeling worthy. Therefore, those who can’t let go of their egos do and say anything they can to always be right. Unfortunately, this happens at the expense of everything else. The desire to always be right can ruin relationships with co-workers, bosses, siblings, relatives and spouses. At some point, you need to realize that the false self-worth that you get from sticking to your guns and “being right” doesn’t outweigh true happiness.

  • ABILITY TO ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR FAULTS:-

Taking ownership and responsibility for your actions is an important part of healthy relationships. Doing so is an empowering reminder that you have control over the role you play in your relationship. Taking responsibility creates trust and dependability.  When you take responsibility for your behaviors, you demonstrate to your partner your willingness to be honest and vulnerable, which in turns encourages your partner to be open and authentic with you.

 

  • EFFORTS TO CORRECT YOUR FAULTS:-

Relationships are challenging and full of lessons. We all make a mistake or two. Mistakes are part of life. However, once we’ve made a mistake and apologized for it, some of us struggle not to repeat the same mistake again. Sadly, committing the same mistakes over again hurts close relationships.

When you feel you’ve made a mistake in a relationship or if someone brings a mistake to your attention, do not fret.

Bring yourself up , accept your faults gently and make efforts to correct it , this kinda effort can help you lead a healthy relationship.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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